I’ve been to four Cub games at Wrigley this year. That’s my all-time high for a season since leaving PNC Park. Unless you’re a stickler for sound fundamentals, it’s tough not to enjoy yourself at the Friendly Confines. Depending on where you sit, of course. It’s time to stop letting fans choose their ticket by location, and give us the option of sitting in groups of peers.
The smoking factor was removed long ago. No more worries about getting caught downwind from the guy with the stogie. Those things can last an entire game.
An alcohol-free zone would be nice for those of us who can manage to make it through nine innings without a beer per. Pretty sure there are ballparks out there with “family friendly” sections, but I’d rather not have to choose between obnoxious drunks and fidgety children.
Set up a few “baseball expert” aisles, so those of us who know that a fastball is faster than a curve ball don’t have to listen to you explain the subtle nuances of the game to your girlfriend. Otherwise, stay home and watch a couple games on TV before you see one live. Bring along your copy of the Baseball Prospectus so she can read what the utility infielder’s high school’s mascot was. The rest of us don’t care, and don’t want to be escorted from the stadium for accidentally spilling six Pepsi’s on you.
Let the people who insist on complaining about their jobs have their own section. There are spectacular views from rock walls on the Lake Michigan shoreline where you can spout off about work for free, and no one else can hear you. You also won’t take the chance that the woman sitting right behind you is the sister of the boss you just tore to shreds because you couldn’t get your cat’s birthday off.
Set up a few seats near the restrooms for people with…medical issues. They always seem to get stuck in the middle or the row. My row.
Most importantly, and maybe the only one necessary, cordon off a section or two for the people who came to actually watch the game. Where the hot dog vendor comes by every half-inning, the outfielders toss baseballs into the stands, and the lights don’t interfere with the ISS passing overhead. That’s not asking too much.
Did I miss anything?